Puzzles

I have been working on a jig saw puzzle, and progress has been slow. I have pieced together the outside frame of the puzzle and am filling in. It’s only a 100 piece puzzle, but I am a novice. Please no snickers from the 1000 piece folks! Sometimes I make very little progress, and I just can’t see a way to fit any pieces together. If I leave the puzzle for several hours, usually I will see an obvious fit as soon as I sit down. It is comforting to know when I finish I will have the picture on the box. There is only one way the puzzle pieces fit , so I do not need to be creative, just persistent. I will keep at it.

I suspect God switched puzzles on me, because I’m having trouble imagining my puzzle will look like the picture I have in my head. I have lost the instructions for building the stairway to Heaven too. Please email me if you have them. Puzzles are usually worked from the frame or edges in. Life is the opposite, the frame is added last. At the moment of death, all unused puzzle pieces disappear, and what is done, is done. How do I want to put the pieces of my life together? There is a slogan in Al-Anon,” Don’t force the solution” i.e. if I just push a little harder I can make these puzzle pieces fit. I know that I just need to try harder. This never works! Unfortunately forcing pieces to fit is my go to response, and I waste a lot of time in denial, anger and sadness. If I find where I belong, I may be the pivotal piece that connects large areas of the puzzle for myself and others. It’s all about knowing and accepting myself. I will fit somewhere.

What if there are missing puzzle pieces? There are always missing pieces in life puzzles, it is unavoidable. When Roger died, pieces of my puzzle just didn’t fit anymore, so I had to throw them away. I can’t fill the empty spots I have in my puzzle. These spaces aren’t really “empty”, they are filled with the losses I have experienced in my life. I can go on putting the pieces I have left into my puzzle and be grateful.

Did you know?
I typed the word pizzle several times when I meant to type puzzle. So if I am piss poor at puzzles, than I pizzle at puzzles! This amused me. Then I thought I should google “pizzle” to make sure it is not a word. Google pizzle? Pizzle means the penis of an animal. I am not making this shit up!

piz·zle\ˈpi-zəl\
noun
1 : the penis of an animal
2 : a whip made of a bull’s pizzle
Origin: probably from Dutch dialect pezel; akin to Low German pesel

Please use “pizzle” in a sentence and keep a straight face.