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Welcome to the Shitshow 2025, the greatest show on earth!!  Reserve your seats now. Tickets are free, but seats are limited. Seating in the front section is reserved for billionaires. There are still seats available outside on the sidewalk, but please bring warm blankets for use due to the frigid cold. Concessions are available to those with indoor seating. No food is available for outdoor seating due to supply chain and entitlement issues. No one will be allowed inside without their “papers”.  Packed suitcases are recommended  for those seated outside. Sit back and enjoy the show and remember there will be no consequences for illegal and immoral behaviors. 

This popular show is being sponsored by billionaires with shit for brains, wads of cash, and greed for more and more. Flattery and blind loyalty are required and the lucky billionaires will get government contracts and big, fat, juicy tax breaks for their contributions and capitulations. Headquarters are located at a private resort in the Sunshine State and contributions are laundered at that location. Documents are stored in plain sight, but no one knows where they are, except Elon.

Help Wanted: The Shitshow is currently hiring for liars, haters, grifters, and brown-nosers. All positions require expertise in cruelty and a loyalty oath to the sadistic CEO . Are you totally unqualified and corrupt and/or a horrible dancer?  Please apply immediately to the Shitshow. Those with enemy lists and sordid pasts are given more than equal opportunity.  Pronoun requests are not accepted and there will be  background checks for wokeness.  A  college degree is required, but must not include courses in history, science, ethics and civics.  We want you if you can lie with a straight face and weave justifications for insane actions. Salary is above average because the rich always get richer.  Each position comes with a pardon and your own personal Supreme Court justice.

This may be your last opportunity to enjoy the show since earth is quickly becoming a hostile and uninhabitable environment. If you believe climate change is a hoax, I have the perfect job for you at the Shitshow 2025!

Molly squibbles. Roscoe gargles gravel. My doggies “sweet talk” when they tell me what they want or how much they love me.  Most of us would be very embarrassed if the whole world could hear how we sweet talk to our pets in private.  “Stinky butt” or “Mollywally” aren’t very respectable dog names.  Bring a baby or a puppy on to the scene and people get all mushy;  “Oh what a good little boy you are.”,or “She’s so cute and sweet.” Some women have success talking to their husbands the same way. I was never very good at  “catching more flies with honey”…I preferred “to put a bee” in his bike helmet. When talking to babies we tend to raise our voices an octave or more. Babies prefer a high pitched voice. When we say, “Pretty please!”we also speak with a higher pitch and a sweet voice. How something is said can be more important than what we say.

We may say “Flattery…will get you nowhere”, but we all know flattery does get you somewhere, often a very long way.  It’s like a diet of junk food and sugar for the psyche. The “Emperor With No Clothes On” shows his naked, fat butt as he struts to his throne. Flattery or “kissing ass” in action. His dressers told him he looked splendid in his new purple robe and he believed them…i.e. see the yes-men Congressmen flatter and kiss Trump’s behind for an excellent  example of brown-nosing. ( ick). They are stepping on each other to fawn over their leader by spewing  insincere and excessive praise. Their goal is to gain favor with Trump:“What can he do for me?”. They believe that he controls their political future. The halls of government are swarmed with flatterers, and a lot of shiny boots with all the boot-licking going on. 

What’s the harm or danger with flattery? This depends on the motive and goal of the flatterer, how easily someone can be manipulated, and what the consequences are! I want you to know how special you are is a long ways from “What can I get from you if I manipulate you with flattery?” Are you trying to get ahead, get information, or deceive someone.? Leaders who are weak and ignorant and thrive on flattery,  can be talked into crashing the course of history. Who is going to tell dear leader that he is “wrong”, and he is being manipulated by people who want to do harm. Hearing how great you are is very pleasant, but if what is being served to you is a shit sandwich of flattery, you will soon be hungry again.

Sweet-talk: way of talking to someone in a pleasing or funny way in order to persuade them to do or believe something.  i.e.. “Honey can you get me a beer?” Or “You big, strong man can you move this for me.” So if there are people around you who praise your every decision, who tell you how smart you are, how wise you are, how brave you are, be assured these people want you to do something for them. These are the flatterers, the smooth talkers who have ulterior motives. Encourage people around you to tell you the truth even though truth can hurt us. This is easier said than done when people in power have invested in lies to stay in power. This “ House of Cards” is held up by flattery. I don’t know about you, but I bet you agree that being thought a fool by most everyone who smiles to our faces is not how I want to live.

Back to babies and puppies. I hope most of the sweet- talking I do is to get babies to smile and puppies to wiggle with joy. 

Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind. 

Rudyard Kipling

Alright, I’ll set the scene…At the intersection of Drake and York, I’m waiting for the light to turn green, and lazily looking at tail lights. Because I’m stopped on top of the hill, this is what I see: many jet trails criss-crossing in the sky and disappearing over the horizon, car exhaust, and my dirty windshield. Scrambling for my phone so I can get a photo, I manage not to collide with the other vehicles. I know this vision is a sign for me. My phone captures the image, but meanings and lessons are elusive and still brewing for me.

Air traffic controllers are directing the jets’ paths in the sky, playing etch-a- sketch with jet trails. Pilots are just following orders and controllers are just doing their jobs. In order to travel in a straight line, we are constantly making minute course corrections as conditions change.

Jets can’t make 90 degree turns like humans are apt to do. In the sky, jumbo jets don’t make 3 point turns. Where can I get that etch-a-sketch? Jet trails cross paths and intersect, but the jets themselves don’t intersect In the 2  dimensional sky. Thank God.

I imagine someday soon there will be no need for pilots and AI and Siri will fly and navigate the jet. Siri will say in her sweet voice “You have arrived/at your destination.” I know my final destination is death. Meanwhile I think the sky is telling me to show up, pay attention and chart a good course. Be mindful of others sharing my airspace and yield the right of way. 

Remember to look up!

When I was 10, I wanted to live to be 100. I also felt that old people were kinda embarrassing and a bit distasteful.  Somehow, I believed I could reach my 100th birthday and I would not have to become old. I wouldn’t have to look or feel old, and others would not see me or treat me as old. Magical childhood thinking that I could have it both ways! Of course, I grew up and now I feel old and look old.  I have indeed became old and I do fit the profile. I could definitely be picked out of a lineup as the old person. Guilty of the crime of aging!

As we know, humans can simultaneously hold 2 opposing viewpoints, we can and do change our minds, and we tell ourselves stories which have no basis in fact but which we strongly believe.  The topic of aging is ripe for all of these mental gymnastics. After all, don’t we want to live to a ripe old age? I am a little wary of using this analogy cause to me it sounds like we’re waiting to throw out fruit that is past its prime. We’re told to not deny aging but to defy aging! We should strive for “super” aging. There is a good, better and best way to age, and I know for sure I haven’t even achieved “good” yet. If I try to defy aging I’ll just look like I’m shadow boxing with myself. I’m tired of trying to become “better” than I am. I want Goldilocks and myself to declare I’m “just right”.

I have to play the hand I’ve been dealt, and sometimes I don’t get a winning hand. This doesn’t mean I’ve lost the game, and in most card games I have a partner that can help me out. I won’t get to 100 if I don’t have family and friends that love me and vice versa. Aging is an individual thing and no one can know how I really feel about my aging body and mind, but I don’t have to be alone and/or lonely in the process. Put two 100 year olds in a room and there are very few generalizations you can make, differences out-weigh similarities. It’s my own story to write and tell and I have things to say. My responsibility is to tell the truth, listen and be kind.

In 2022, 56 million people, almost 17% of U.S. population was over 65.  By 2050,  it is expected that about 23% of our population will be over 65.  I’m not always a proud member of the over 65 club. “I am old, hear me roar.”  Not so much!  But I’ll take the Senior discounts and my retirement. Remember that I am not an old woman,  I am a woman who is old. And yes, I have a lot of wisdom, but since no one listens to me anyway I’ll just enjoy the show.

“ I’m not afraid of dying, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.”

                                                                                            Woody Allen

A few short months ago it was two very old men running for President, both suffering from some cognitive decline. The one with integrity and good character drops out and the other with zero integrity stays in the race and sells bibles and shoes on the side. A  younger woman enters the race, but she is getting “ blacker”  by the minute and is a socialist, communist, fascist, and enemy of the state and stupid— this according to the “trustworthy”, demented old man still in the race. Just an ordinary election year in the country we all love. I am very afraid that we are sleep walking into the loss of our democracy and we are just watching it happen. Wake up!!

When I was 6, my family moved from a small farm in Iowa to Chicago. I went from cows mooing and green fields to honking cars and lots of concrete. Talk about culture shock! I asked my Mom why that man’s skin was dark, and if he was dirty and needed to take a bath. My cousin Brad, still living in Iowa at the time, wanted to know why blacks always smelled bad? When I asked him how many he had smelled, he said none, but his uncle had. I was young so I think I adapted quickly, my parents had a harder time of it. Why am I sharing this story? To tell you about myself, but..you know there is always a but. Everything I have just told you is a lie! I just made it up. It was so easy too. How do we feel about being deceived? It pisses me off! What if we trust the people who are lying to us? Betrayal is not something anyone looks forward to.

Shakespeare said “ What a tangled web we weave when we first practice to deceive.” What did he mean? Don’t waste your time trying to answer this, it’s a trick question because Shakespeare did not say this. It is a quote from a Walter Scott poem. Already the web of deceit is being woven. Lies are compounded and people get more confused. It’s much easier to be consistent when you only need to remember one version of a story, the truth

Fact-checking is the process of verifying the factual accuracy of questioned reporting and statements. What if I had a fact checker following me around? It is a fierce battle to fact-check when there are so many lies being put forth as the truth. Social media, and Trump and his minions, vomit lies by the  millisecond. What if I start to question the conspiracies my tribe subscribes to? I could end up ostracized and alone.   Propaganda is spreading lies in order to help a cause, a political leader or a government. Social media and Trump and his minions vomit lies every millisecond. Propaganda magnifies doubt, and doubt magnifies fear. Fear can promote aggression, disengagement and paralysis. I know I cycle thru these emotions every day.

People lie for a multitude of reasons. It may be to get other people to like them, to control a situation or because they desperately want something  to be true.The question is not why do people lie, it is “Why do people tell the truth?” Truth or consequences, but what if there are no consequences for lying?. I think, no one else will ever know.”,but I  will know. I  “embellish” or “ stretch the truth” or leave out parts of stories, and kid myself  that I am not  lying.If  we build our lives on lies,  the truth can be an earthquake of destruction. I have learned the truth about some family myths and I’m not sure if this was a net positive.

The lies I tell to myself about myself are lies just the same.The psychological costs of lying can be lower self esteem, more stress from “managing” the lie, and guilt and shame. My intention is to tell the truth and do the right thing, but to be “honest” I fail a good share of  the time.

“The fact that a great many people believe something is no guarantee of its truth.” —W. Somerset Maugham, writer. AND Margaret Taylor Greene is lying when she says the federal government controls the weather. I know it’s a lie because she has not been struck by lightning.

I am queen of metaphors and similes. I owe it all to Freshman English Composition. My liberal use of comparisons and/or analogies help me to tell my stories and understand myself much better. Today, I am the little wind up toy that is wound tight and released. I think they are still available.  The song,“The Marvelous Toy” by Peter, Paul and Mary tells us about them.

 It went “Zip” when it moved

And “Bop” when it stopped

And “Whirrr” when it stood still

I never knew just what it was and I guess I never will

I remember …

I picked it up and wound it and set it down. I can see it now making its way across the table or floor “zipping”as it went. It would change direction if it hit an object in its path, or get stuck and “whirr” in place until it wound down and was silent. Or like Humpty Dumpty it could take a great fall right off the table….

The who or what that winds me up has changed throughout my life, and certainly as I have aged. I was full of energy, positive or nervous energy, and often wound myself up. I was running away or running towards or stalled out with no energy to move at all. It was a game of “Red Rover” and Danita was sent right over. If I couldn’t break through into the  “popular” or “successful”  world, then I would just “bop”. The worst scenario was when I ignored “ Danger” signs and “zipped” when I should have “bopped”.  Sometimes, no matter how many hints I got to change direction I just kept right  on going. It is wonderful, but rare when the path ahead is clear and free of obstacles. But I can still make my own obstacles or head for the cliff and take a great fall to end it all. 

Today I’m an educated “Marvelous Toy”!  A toy that has “Been there, done that” and takes the time to ask ” How important is it?”. I’m not tossed around by so many outside forces. On the days I don’t have much “ zip” I appreciate and find comfort in the “ whirr” in being still. I take good care of my toy. I put it in a safe place and never wind it too tight, and no flipping or jumping anymore. I hope for lots more “zip”.

Wind in your face

Wind at your back

Makes no difference 

Just keep going.

You were expecting easy

What you got is hard.

There isn’t a soft landing

The level of difficulty is high

Just keep going. 

You remember your history

How it went 100 times before

But there were lessons learned 

Just keep going.

Cheat the future

Stack the deck

Set it up so you win.

Roadblocks and detours

The flag man says “stop”.

You wait your turn

But you don’t quit

You just keep going.

When the devil of “I can’t”

Breathes down your neck

Tell him to go to hell.

Just for today, keep going.

Keep going….

Kamala:  ( comma la)  ( , la) Should I put a comma here? Yes!   Shakespeare asked “What’s in a name?”. Donald Trump thinks he has an answer with one of his many creative stupid ways to show his disrespect for someone. Coining nicknames and mispronouncing the names of his opponents is one of his attempts to dominate, it’s a power move to give others a nasty nickname. He  actually weaponizes a person’s name against them.  Kamala Harris has told us many times how to pronounce her name. Trump has said “ People think I mispronounce it on purpose, but actually I’ve heard it said about seven different ways. There are a lot of ways.…I said, ‘don’t worry about it’. It doesn’t matter what I say. I couldn’t care less if I mispronounce it or not. I couldn’t care less.” That’s obvious! He’s not alone,  (R.)Nancy Mace has taken some heat for repeatedly mispronouncing Kamala. Her “adult” response, “I will say Kamala’s name any way that I want to!”  I am particularly offended by their name games, it strikes a nerve and just plain pisses me off.  

It turns out there’s a lot in a name. I’m at Starbucks and listening to names being called out to let people know their order is ready. I hear“ Danita” and it’s coffee time! When we introduce ourselves it’s the first piece of information we share. We Midwest folk joke, “Call me anything, but don’t call me late for supper.”, but we don’t really mean it’s ok to call me “anything”.  Making an effort to remember and correctly pronounce someone’s name helps them feel seen and valued. If I’ve told someone my name, and pronounced it for them a couple of times, and they still get it wrong they don’t really care! 

My friend, Missey, seldom uses her legal first name,“Mary”, unless it’s for official documents and business. She is not a “Mary”, she is a “ Missey”. I think people kind of grow into or out of their names. Lots of people are known by their first names only, or by a name they have chosen; i.e. Cher, Prince, Pink, Picasso. Some very popular songs are named after women; i.e. Billie Jean, Jolene, Roxanne , Betty Davis Eyes….  I’ve never met “ A Boy Named Sue”, but I know “ I’m Henry the Eighth. I Am”, “Hey Jude” and “ Bad, Bad Leroy Brown”. I’ve always been amused by the very colorful nicknames for Mafia members; i.e. Dapper Don, Ice Pick Willie, Scarface…. I think I’d want my Mafia name to be Big Toad. (There’s a story, but I’m not going there now.) We want our pets to come when they are called, and they don’t care if their name is “Scuttlebutt”. I have had nicknames for all my pets, and some I’m embarrassed to share, but my animals are never offended. 

What do we do about Trump’s  name calling and denigration of Kamala’s name?  Turn the other cheek or punch him? Guess which one I prefer?!  Or even better we could not vote for him. I’m sure Trump does not understand why the Vietnam War Memorial is so moving. It displays the names of all the soldiers who died in Vietnam. It’s pretty hard to dismiss all those soldiers, who Trump has referred to as “ suckers and losers”, when you see the thousands of names on the wall. The reading of the names is the very least we can do. I nominate Donald Trump to read aloud all of the names slowly and correctly while standing in front of the memorial. 

I’ve always loved the song “ I am…I said “by Neil Diamond. 

I am…I said

To no one there

And no one heard at all, not even the chair

“I am”… I cried

“I am”… said I

And I am lost, and I can’t even say why

“I am”… I said 

“I am”… I cried

“I am”… I said

So the next time someone asks you what your name is—say it proudly and give it it’s due. “ I am…I said”   I am DANITA.