What’s Your Name?

Kamala:  ( comma la)  ( , la) Should I put a comma here? Yes!   Shakespeare asked “What’s in a name?”. Donald Trump thinks he has an answer with one of his many creative stupid ways to show his disrespect for someone. Coining nicknames and mispronouncing the names of his opponents is one of his attempts to dominate, it’s a power move to give others a nasty nickname. He  actually weaponizes a person’s name against them.  Kamala Harris has told us many times how to pronounce her name. Trump has said “ People think I mispronounce it on purpose, but actually I’ve heard it said about seven different ways. There are a lot of ways.…I said, ‘don’t worry about it’. It doesn’t matter what I say. I couldn’t care less if I mispronounce it or not. I couldn’t care less.” That’s obvious! He’s not alone,  (R.)Nancy Mace has taken some heat for repeatedly mispronouncing Kamala. Her “adult” response, “I will say Kamala’s name any way that I want to!”  I am particularly offended by their name games, it strikes a nerve and just plain pisses me off.  

It turns out there’s a lot in a name. I’m at Starbucks and listening to names being called out to let people know their order is ready. I hear“ Danita” and it’s coffee time! When we introduce ourselves it’s the first piece of information we share. We Midwest folk joke, “Call me anything, but don’t call me late for supper.”, but we don’t really mean it’s ok to call me “anything”.  Making an effort to remember and correctly pronounce someone’s name helps them feel seen and valued. If I’ve told someone my name, and pronounced it for them a couple of times, and they still get it wrong they don’t really care! 

My friend, Missey, seldom uses her legal first name,“Mary”, unless it’s for official documents and business. She is not a “Mary”, she is a “ Missey”. I think people kind of grow into or out of their names. Lots of people are known by their first names only, or by a name they have chosen; i.e. Cher, Prince, Pink, Picasso. Some very popular songs are named after women; i.e. Billie Jean, Jolene, Roxanne , Betty Davis Eyes….  I’ve never met “ A Boy Named Sue”, but I know “ I’m Henry the Eighth. I Am”, “Hey Jude” and “ Bad, Bad Leroy Brown”. I’ve always been amused by the very colorful nicknames for Mafia members; i.e. Dapper Don, Ice Pick Willie, Scarface…. I think I’d want my Mafia name to be Big Toad. (There’s a story, but I’m not going there now.) We want our pets to come when they are called, and they don’t care if their name is “Scuttlebutt”. I have had nicknames for all my pets, and some I’m embarrassed to share, but my animals are never offended. 

What do we do about Trump’s  name calling and denigration of Kamala’s name?  Turn the other cheek or punch him? Guess which one I prefer?!  Or even better we could not vote for him. I’m sure Trump does not understand why the Vietnam War Memorial is so moving. It displays the names of all the soldiers who died in Vietnam. It’s pretty hard to dismiss all those soldiers, who Trump has referred to as “ suckers and losers”, when you see the thousands of names on the wall. The reading of the names is the very least we can do. I nominate Donald Trump to read aloud all of the names slowly and correctly while standing in front of the memorial. 

I’ve always loved the song “ I am…I said “by Neil Diamond. 

I am…I said

To no one there

And no one heard at all, not even the chair

“I am”… I cried

“I am”… said I

And I am lost, and I can’t even say why

“I am”… I said 

“I am”… I cried

“I am”… I said

So the next time someone asks you what your name is—say it proudly and give it it’s due. “ I am…I said”   I am DANITA.